Part 9

We washed up and lay naked together, again snuggled closely until we finally went into dreamland. 


The next morning, we woke up to have a late breakfast or brunch at the hotel’s coffeehouse with Ah Tee. Then we went back to the room to pack my bags. It’s time for me to go back to my home land. Some how or rather, there was this heavy feeling in my heart so there were no morning love making, just the normal chit-chats. Ah Tee then brought me to the travel agency where I had to board the coach back. As there was still some time, Keow and I sat at a nearby coffee shop to past the time away. Finally I had to go. Keow’s eyes were watery, so was mine. I gave her my handkerchief but she immediately returned it back to me, explaining that if she took the handkerchief, it would mean that I’m never coming back. I made a promise to her that I’ll be back very soon, and took down her address. Those days the WLs don’t carry expensive mobile phones like now.

We gave each other a last, long, hug, not wanting to let go, but I had to board the bus. I looked around, and there were several other couples, sharing the same moments as me, their tiraks all in tears like Keow. Up the bus, through the windows, I could see Keow sobbing in tears, waving goodbye to me. I held back my tears, gave a weak smile and returned the wave. My heart was aching, and I felt like not going back and stay in Hatyai with my Keow. The bus moved and soon I’m on my way back to Singapore. I was restless on the whole journey back, crying silently in my heart as I already missed my Keow. Couldn’t sleep in the night too as I kept thinking of her. Finally, tiredness overcame me, and I dozed off into dreamland, with only my Keow in it.

We reach Singapore in the morning, and dad was there at Golden Mile to pick me up. On reaching home, I decided to talk to mum, as she was the only one who would understand me. I told mum about Keow, the woman I’m now madly in love with, of course hiding the fact that she’s a WL. I wanted to go back to marry Keow. Mum was strongly against it, thinking it was only infatuation. I was persistent, giving excuses like we were already considered married by Thai traditions, thinking the events at the Thai cultural show may have some bearings.. Not to be taken, mum, being the CO of the house, kept my passport and banned me from leaving the country for a year. And I thought she would understood me.

In those days, communication was by letter writing. Using perfumed pads and envelopes, I wrote a few letters to Keow in English, where I guess she got it translated, professing my love for her. She replied in Thai which I got it translated in Golden Mile, professing her love for me. She would wait for me. Our weekly letters up and down became less frequent, until I was the one who stopped writing. I couldn’t remember how exactly it stopped, but probably due to my work commitments.

A year passed, and when I finally got my license to travel again, the first thing I did was head up North to Hatyai again to look for my Keow. Ah Tee was still there and he remembered me. He remembered Keow too and brought me to the farm but apparently Keow was not there anymore. She had gone back to her village some time back. Fucks! No one knew her address, or how to contact her. 

As usual, I had a good time too, on my second trip, but my heart longed for Keow. I did go to Hatyai several times with friends for some sexcursions, and on every trip, there was a silent wish that I may bump into Keow. Till today, some twenty years later, I can still remember Keow, how she look and if I ever get the chance to see her, I would recognized her. This was a woman that I had loved, not infatuated like what mum said. If I can go back in time 20 years, I would look for my Keow and be persistent in marrying her. Each time I relive my story to friends, I feel for Keow. Each time I post my story to forums, I feel for Keow. But as the saying goes, life goes on….. But till today eventhough I'm happily married with 3 sons, still whenever I think of Keow, there’s an emptiness in my heart that can never be fulfilled.

The End